Can I just address the elephant in the room for a minute?
What hasn’t 2020 brought us? I probably shouldn’t even say that because I don’t want the universe to see that as a challenge. I certainly don’t have the answers for everyone, but here’s what’s working for me in this pandemic/distance learning/conspiracy theory/civil unrest season of life.
I’m focusing on big picture things
“Will what I’m focusing my energy on right now matter next year? In 5 years? 10 years?”
If the answer is no to that question it’s probably not a big picture thing. The facebook argument between strangers that’s getting me worked up won’t matter 10 minutes from now let alone 10 years from now. I can’t allow it to take my time and, even more important, my energy. The dishes are piled up but I’m in the middle of helping my kids with their distance learning? It’s more important to me that they feel supported during such a chaotic time. That will matter in the bigger picture, the dishes won’t.
I’m turning off the news
Being informed is important but constantly consuming information that may or may not even be true is so draining to me. I know some feel differently about this and it may be considered irresponsible by some to not keep up with the latest events but in order for me to show up as the best mom and wife which are my most important roles, I have to turn it off.
I can’t play my role in making the world a better place when I’m consumed by the daily new crises that have been arising. Maybe it makes me a bad citizen to some, but to me it’s my way of showing up as my best self which has a greater impact in making the world better than my worried, stressed, anxious self can.
I’m teaching my kids what I’ve always wanted to
Even the best school in the world can’t teach my kids everything, and I wouldn’t want them to. I have always wanted to have a more hands on experience with their education and so in this season I have had more time to think about what that looks like.
I can’t teach them anything math or science related (and trust me, they wouldn’t want me to even try) but I can research topics I want them to learn about and find really great books, documentaries and podcasts to share with them. I can have them spend time in my office while I work so they can hear how I communicate with the people I work with, how I write thank you notes, how I package up orders, how I make people feel important. I can take them to all the open trails and parks that I’ve been “meaning to get to” that are now some of the only things that are open and let them run around and be kids.
Most importantly I can show them what it looks like to pivot when things are going according to plan. 2020 certainly wasn’t in our plans.
Grace upon grace
None of us have ever lived through what we’re experiencing in the world right now. I have had situations where I wanted to be angry with people, and maybe for a minute I was, but my new mantra is “Bless her heart, she’s just doing the best she can isn’t she?” … and then I move on. I would hope people would extend the same grace to me in this season.
It’s difficult when every instinct in me is seeking to gain control over the circumstances we’re in. Peace is different than control, though, so in this season I’m seeking peace. I’m believing that you will find peace too.